Hyacinth
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"But I thought your friends liked your lilac car ..."
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"Beautiful day, isn't it? Completely conducive to contemplating
cozy charismatic country cottages."
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"The Bouquet residence, lady of the house speaking.
(Pause) Oh, it's you Daisy".
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"It's my sister Violet, the one with the Mercedes,
sauna and a musical bidet. Classical, of course.".
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"It's my sister Violet, the one with the Mercedes,
sauna and room for a pony."
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(about the clergyman/Vicar) "Rings his own bells?
How democratic".
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"My next door neighbour, Elizabeth, you met her at
one one of my candle light suppers, she drops things".
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"But is it a large tear in his flamenco frock?"
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"I once caught Richard playing with a frisbee, he said
he found it, but I wasn't sure."
- "I'll have to have the Vicar's confirmation that this is Angel
Gabrielle blue."
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"They are my family and I love them dearly, especially
at this time of year, when it gets dark early."
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"The one thing that distinguishes us from other people
is the absence of vulgar noise"
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"Now listen horse, I'm not a person to be trifled with."
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"I do apologise, Vicar, I must answer my white, slimline
telephone with last number redial facilities, it's bound to be someone important."
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"I do hope you're not going to spoil things with lower
middle class humor"
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"Oh no dear! I couldn't let you loose as a Roman again!"
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"Home, Richard! I will not share my throne with these
impostors!"
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(while searching for Iron Age remains) "According to
the book, we should find the remains of barrows somewhere around here. I expect they carried rocks and things around!"
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"Its a matter of complete indifference to me whether
the milks pasteurized, immunized, sterilized or privatized! I will not share my milk bottles with strangers"
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Hyacinth while talking to the vicar: "What is the missionary
position in China these days?"
- (Hyacinth) "Richard, I've been offered a job at Frosticles."
- "People who try to pretend they're superior make it so much harder
for those of us who really are."- Hyacinth
- "It's very tiring boating on foot."- Hyacinth
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"Important as I am in local circles, I have not yet risen to the level where I can walk on water."- Hyacinth
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"I will not have you spreading rumors that I might be married to somebody who wears overalls."- Hyacinth
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Hyacinth: It's my sister Daisy. She's not the one with the Mercedes, sauna and room for a pony.
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Hyacinth: This is not the Chinese restaurant. This is a residential number and you are speaking to the lady of the house
on a white, slim line telephone with last number redial facility
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Hyacinth: [on the phone] No, I will not send over another portion of deep-fried squid. This is not the Chinese take-away.
You are connected to a private residence on a white, slimlined telephone with last-number redial facility.
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Hyacinth: Oh, Richard. You know haw much I love daddy. I would have him here if it wasn't for all the time he spends in
the bathroom.
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Hyacinth: Take your shoes off before you enter the house, dear.
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Hyacinth: Coffee in ten minutes, Elizabeth! Bring Emmet!
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Hyacinth: Sheridaaaaaaan!
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Hyacinth: Tell Onslow to go and put a shirt on.
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Hyacinth: It's Bouquet!
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Hyacinth: It's Bouquet! B-U-C-K-E-T!
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Hyacinth: I would be very pleased if you would accept my invitation to one my candle light suppers
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Hyacinth: Rose, that skirt's too short!
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Hyacinth: If my Sheridan were here he'd be appalled!
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Hyacinth: Sit wherever you like, dear... *except* there! I always like to face the window.
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Hyacinth: Richard a little decorum please, that is not the sort of behaviour one would expect from a person with a reservation
for a quailty cruise
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Hyacinth: I want you to instruct your superiors that this is a first class stamp residence.
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Hyacinth: All the men like Rose, that's her problem.
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Hyacinth: What a wonderful sense of duty Daddy has.
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